Hey ylwdogsc,
I have an article that may help you address this issue and contains some helpful troubleshooting tips for this type of issue:
iOS: Troubleshooting car stereo connections
http://support.apple.com/kb/ts3581
Troubleshooting tips
Beginning playback and controlling music
Some car stereos may require that playback be started or controlled from either the device or the stereo. Ensure that your car stereo is set to the proper input for your device. If it is and you cannot hear sound from your car speakers, try switching to your radio and then back to the proper input.
When using adapters to connect to your car stereo, you may notice variations in audio quality. When possible, use a shorter connection to the car stereo or try a different cable or adapter.
Disconnect and restart
If you are experiencing difficulties with the connection between your stereo and device, disconnect the device, and then power cycle the stereo and your iPhone, iPod touch, or iPad. When the Home screen reappears, reconnect your device. If you cannot power cycle the stereo, turn the car off and then back on to allow the stereo to power off.
Isolate the issue
Try to reproduce the issue with an identical or similar accessory, if one is available, or test with a second device.
Example: If you hear static coming from the left audio channel, try connecting a different device or try connecting to a different stereo or accessory that connects over the same interface (30-pin or Lightning connector, Bluetooth, or headphone jack).
Restore iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch
If you have isolated an issue to the device, restore iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch to its factory condition. You should rarely need to use this step with an accessory issue. If the issue affects only a third-party accessory, contact the accessory manufacturer before restoring your iOS device.
If the device does not update successfully, the issue may lie with the device and not with the accessory. See one of the following articles, depending on your device:
Take care, and thanks for visiting the Apple Support Communities.
Cheers,
Braden