Hi Waddo,
It is important to specify the objects in question. "Photo" has no specific meaning in digital photography or in Aperture (the designers' use the term is sloppy and un-helpful).
Your camera creates data from light and saves this data to a file. You import the data into your Aperture Library. Aperture calls imported files "Originals". Your Originals are never altered, and are always and repeatably available to you. Select any Image(s), and execute "File ▹ Export ▹ Original(s) ... ". In addition to specifying to where you want the files exported, you separately specify both a Finder folder structure and a file name. There are built-in Presets for each; you can customize your own. These Presets are found at "Aperture ▹ Presets ▹ File Naming" and "Aperture ▹ Presets ▹ Folder Naming".
Exporting, however, is not what you want to do: you don't need (and should not) export any files to accomplish your goal. Exporting creates files to be used elsewhere. All you want to do is relocate some of the Images' Originals.
Aperture places little restraint on where you have it store your Images' Originals, other than that they should be on a locally-mounted drive. You can store them inside the Aperture Library package (that shows as a file in Finder), or outside the Library package. You can relocate them any time, using the tool Aperture provides: "File ▹ Relocate Originals ... ". Note that here, too, there are Presets for file naming and Finder folder naming.
In short, it is easy and wise to do what you want to do: make the results of yours and your wife's practice identical. You may find the available customizing options can not be made to match what you have been doing outside of Aperture. I suggest settling on a storage structure that is useful to you, _and_ can be created and maintained with Aperture's tools. I store all referenced Originals one level deep by Project Name, and rigorously apply a Project-naming convention.
The distinction between whether your Images' Originals are stored inside you Library package or not is an important one. Originals that you store outside the Library package are called "Referenced"; Originals that you store inside the Library package are called "Managed". A brief description of the meaning of these terms — and other important information — can be found in my concise guide. Read it, and ask more.
Lastly, note that the Finder folder structure is strictly for the user. The OS uses its own internal naming and storing schemes. Your files are no more "in" a Finder folder than they are "on" your desktop. I mention this because many people spend too much time (imho) administering a Finder folder structure for storing Originals. Aperture _is_ a database management system. Your files are data. Aperture provides much more administrative power and efficiency than Finder. There is no reason to use both to manage your ... photos.
HTH.
—Kirby.
