Accessing itunes library

My husband and I use the same iTunes library on our Mac but different user accounts. Recently I have "lost" access to his library. This is a problem since all our playlists, etc are on the same one.

When I open iTunes it defaults to a blank library though it does have access to the same music and movie files. When I try to use a different library (via holding down the option key) I cannot open his library (it is shaded out). I have checked that I have access to it (its not shaded out via finder and I did a "get info" to make sure).

Any advice?