my apple id lost

You should be able to reset your password by answering your security questions on http://iforgot.apple.com . If you can't remember your answers then contact Support in your country, after confirming your id and that it's your account they should be able to reset your password and answers.

Contacting Apple about account security : Contact Apple for help with Apple ID account security

If your country isn't on that page then try this form to contact Support : https://www.apple.com/emea/support/itunes/contact.html

Then update your primary email address to be an account that you have access to : Change your Apple ID - Apple Support

After changing it : What to do after you change your Apple ID email address or password - Apple Support

(As these are user-to-user public forums I've asked the hosts to remove your id from yours post.)