Setting up FaceTime after the latest update is driving me nuts!

Suddenly FaceTime is giving my teenage daughter's phone number as the default caller ID number. I have tried following the steps found elsewhere in the support forum and it does not change. Additionally, every time my wife's iPhone rings, FaceTime logs it as a missed call. This is not the same number as the default caller ID number. Right now I have every box unchecked in FaceTime except my email and it is still happening. We all three of us have iPhones. We all use my AppleID and account for things like iBooks, iTunes, and the App Store. This is how we WANT to do it. When I tried to set up Family Sharing, my ID comes up with my wife's photo and my email. I can't even change the bloody photo to one of me! When I tried to add my wife to family sharing, even though her email is different from mine, I am being told that I can't add myself to the family. I just want us all to be able to use our phones separately and use the desktop iMac to make FaceTime calls, and have only ONE BILL to coordinate purchases in iTunes, etc. This never used to be an issue, and the fixes I've attempted so far do not help. I'm truly sorry if I sound snippy, but I am really irritated. Any help greatly appreciated.