Family sharing/sharing reminders lists - not syncing

MMyself and my hubby have an iPhone and an iPad each. Kids have ipad minis. I have recently set up home sharing and set up a couple of reminders lists with the hubby. When it was just on my iPhone and iPads, everything seemed to sync fine. Now, the reminders lists don't sync unless I turn reminder off in the iCloud setting on the iPhone, and then back on again. I'm afraid I am going to lose something. Do I need to update some settings? It's kind of pointless if they don't sync across all devices.........