Greetings garyfromnormal,
After reviewing your post, it sounds like you are not able to eject an iPod from iTunes for Windows. I would recommend that you read this article, it may be able to help the issue.
How to eject an iPod - Apple Support
If the iPod display continues to indicate that it shouldn't be disconnected, use the method below to eject your iPod:
- Windows XP and Windows 2000: Double-click My Computer.
Windows Vista: From the Start menu, click Computer.
- Right-click the iPod icon.
- From the shortcut menu, choose Eject.
Thanks for using Apple Support Communities.
Take care