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Helpful answers
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Aug 3, 2016 5:54 AM in response to Jjdizonby Ella Fitzgerald,Follow the instructions If you forgot your Apple ID password - Apple Support
Then go there to get help with setting up your iPhone as new. How to erase your iOS device and then set it up as a new device or restore it from backups - Apple Support
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Aug 3, 2016 8:35 AM in response to Jjdizonby LACAllen,Without that password, resetting/erasing your phone is of no value. This is what is known as "activation lock" You are unable to turn off Find My Phone as you are signing out of iCloud. This is by design and is for the protection of the data on the phone.
If your mom is the original owner and has a valid proof of purchase to show that, you can ask Apple to remove the activation lock.
You must contact them to do this.
Your iTunes issue sounds like a network issue where iTunes is not able to make a stable connection to the update servers.