Kappy-
I'm in a similar boat; however with mine, it is intermittent and I discovered that when hooking up an external HD screen (not Apple) using the thunderbolt and a Mini DisplayPort to HDMI connector, my iMac would also not wake from sleep. However, if I caught it before it moved into hibernation mode? it would still wake.
I have started unplugging that external monitor before sleep and it has been issue free until this evening.
I had to force shutdown and restart after forgetting to unplug. Everything went smoothly- then I unplugged my external monitor before sleep and when returning an hour later, the computer seemingly had shut itself down. I pressed power the chime happened and my mouse pointer appeared on a black screen. The login screen never appeared. I had to force shutdown again. Is it possible that my iMac behavior is similar to Adam's?
So, back to the response to Adam-
I wonder if completely erasing and reinstalling is the ONLY solution to this? I can't imagine it is. Nightmare.
Thanks.