is there a way for users not to find me on any social media by using imessage?

I'm sorry but your question doesn't make a lot of sense. iMessage and your social media accounts are not connected. What are you trying to do? Or trying to prevent?

If you use the same email for your Apple ID as you do for your social media accounts, it's possible that people who you have contacted using iMessage could search for you using your email. But, they could do the same thing if you send them an email from that email address.

Go to Settings>Messages>Send & Receive and untick your email address.