Q: cannot sign into itunes, saying it is disabled

If your account's been disabled for security reasons then resetting the password might fix it : If your Apple ID has been locked - Apple Support

You might then need to log out and back into the account wherever you're using it : What to do after you change your Apple ID email address or password - Apple Support

If that doesn't fix it contact iTunes Support : https://www.apple.com/emea/support/itunes/contact.html

My iphone is not recognized with my new mac (used) book pro, says cannot connect to iphoen "iphone" gave an invalid repsonse

You will be better off starting your own thread in the iTunes For Mac forum (iTunes for Mac), your problem is unrelated to OPs question.

But if your phone is on iOS 10 you need Mac OS X 10.9.5+ on the Mac, and the current version of iTunes (version 12.5.1) installed on it