Why is iMessage combining two contacts into one thread. I can only text back the last one that messaged me. This started with iOS 12

My wife is experiencing the same problem with our two kids (all three on iPhones and iOS 12). Anything she sends to my daughter's phone number goes to my daughter's phone and son's phone. But anything sent to my son's phone number only goes to my daughter's phone. The message thread only has each of their phone numbers on them. It isn't a group message text. That seems to work OK (group messages). The each have their own contact with the right phone assigned. All four of use my Apple ID.

appleforumuserguy wrote:

If I setup a new ID for my wife, is it necessary to wipe the device as if I were going to sell it? I don't really want her to lose all the apps she has downloaded or have to take the time to download them all again since our home internet is slow.

Yes, you probably should. If you leave the apps that were downloaded under your Apple ID on the phone, she will need to enter your Apple ID password every time they need to be updated. Then there's the possibility that you will have forgotten to sign out of something somewhere that will cause issues in the future.

What a mess. Where is the Apple Easy here. There is nothing easy about wiping all your family phones in the hope that it fixes a problem that IOS 12 caused without any notice at all. There have to be millions with same issue and its beyond belief that Apple has not commented. I have spoken to several periodicals about this who have said they have reached out to Apple for comment and they just won't respond. Is this really Apple? The new Apple? I just don't get their silence here but I am telling everyone that I know and my guess is that you are too. Nice branding.

Some of us have been using iPhones and sharing the Apple ID LOOOOONG before family sharing was started. Not exactly sure how we could be expected to configure our phones to meet a requirement that didn't exist at that time.

Philly_Phan wrote:

The issue affects only those iPhones that were not configured according to Apple's recommendations.

This is blatantly untrue as evidenced by many people posting to this question.

cmce01, for better or worse, this has turned into an ideologically war of responses in this thread. Apple does indeed not recommend sharing (and never has, though you can buy and sign in as many simultaneous iPhones as you'd like...), it can mess up a lot of stuff (contacts, FaceTime, content, etc.), and with this release it has messed up iMessage. That said, after some adjustments to settings and upgrading to iOS 12.0.1, our family's iMessage (which shares IDs across a number of phones) works fine again. Hopefully yours will too. I would like to say thanks to whoever the moderator is for this group (maybe its a bot - thank you bot) for removing the flame threads - including the one that questioned my parenting the last time I posted about why I've kept this sharing ID set up this way. If you keep doing it this way (sharing IDs), its clear you will have issues that people who don't share IDs won't have. To the poster whose child is struggling with behavioral health concerns - the easiest thing to do is to move to WhatsApp or another messaging app for your family so you can communicate with your child - way faster and less complicated than purging AppleIDs, setting up new ones, etc. Having lived through similar challenges with a teen, I appreciate how much stress this is likely causing your family...good luck. Whether its supported or not...don't let Apple's lack of responsiveness to your issue challenge your ability to communicate with your children. And I wouldn't expect them to respond...

Just to keep the semantics straight. Apple has ALWAYS supported ID sharing among DEVICES but has NEVER supported ID sharing among HUMANS. One Apple ID can be used on a thousand iPhones provided that the same human uses all those iPhones.

So true - there has been no notification that sharing an apple ID with family is detrimental. I have had an iPhone since the first release. I can't recall any message or notification that sharing an apple ID with my family was an issue - and don't source me some link to an apple site that states sharing an apple ID is wrong - it wasn't communicated. I did it to have some control over app downloads, etc for the family. This was way before Home Sharing and now I am having to deal with this? Nice that apple hid this issue with the new ios12 debut without any notice. So unlike apple. I have been a fan for decades but this BS is intolerable - since it limits communication with key family members.

So if I set up family sharing does that fix the issue? My daughter has always had her own ID that she uses to sign into iMessage and FaceTime. Her device is signed into iTunes and the App Store with my ID. Will using family sharing solve this or is it too late?

Something we liked about sharing an Apple ID? It gave us the ability to monitor the texts are children were sending and receiving (Whether it be an iPhone, iPad or iPod). Once we established individual IDs, that ability has gone away. That’s my major issue with forcing us to use individual IDs. But we’ve done it. I’ll warily update to the newest release and pray that it doesn’t start all over again.

jmiller1000 wrote:

They may have never supported it, but they didn't stop it from happening. This is apples issue not the millions of people - mostly family's (before home share was out) that did this.

Of course they didn't stop it. You have the legal right to use your iPhone in any manner you choose.

janetfromsimpsonville wrote:

Something we liked about sharing an Apple ID? It gave us the ability to monitor the texts are children were sending and receiving (Whether it be an iPhone, iPad or iPod). Once we established individual IDs, that ability has gone away. That’s my major issue with forcing us to use individual IDs. But we’ve done it. I’ll warily update to the newest release and pray that it doesn’t start all over again.

I disagree vehemently with parents monitoring their children's activities like that.

I'm not sure why you think that's germane to this thread, but we get it. You've said that already, many times. Hopefully you've never had to struggle with a child with behavioral health concerns, because there are clearly others on this string who have and also others who have used this ability to support their parenting efforts. For what it's worth, I'm fine with parents monitoring their child's activities like this. And I'm guessing none of you really care...

sjvivian wrote:

I'm not sure why you think that's germane to this thread, but we get it. You've said that already, many times. Hopefully you've never had to struggle with a child with behavioral health concerns, because there are clearly others on this string who have and also others who have used this ability to support their parenting efforts. For what it's worth, I'm fine with parents monitoring their child's activities like this. And I'm guessing none of you really care...

It's not germane but that "need" has been repeated by others.

The point of this thread is to discuss the problem we are experiencing with the latest update as it pertains to iMessage. The point of this thread is NOT to attack or voice your opinion of another’s parenting choices. That’s distasteful is this type of forum when we are trying to find ways to solve a problem that Apple hasn’t acknowledged or fixed.