Impossible to sync iphone 11 with windows 11 on PC

I have tried every suggestion I can find to put my music onto my phone and nothing works. Specifically, I have had the phone for a while (obviously since it is an iphone 11). I have Windows 11 on my PC, and iTunes was already installed. I plugged my phone in and iTunes happily recognized my phone.

iTunes showed the library of my music on the PC. But before I could sync to my phone, it suggested that I should update my iOS from 17.4 to 17.4.1. OK, I told it to update. But before it would update, it told me I had purchased music on my phone that had not be transferred to iTunes. This is where the frustration began. I tried the following (and probably more that I've forgotten since I've been at this for more than 9 hours):

• Tried transferring music from phone to iTunes. It wouldn't do it.
• Went online but Apple store said I didn't have ANY music purchased (!).
• Eventually resolved that, but there were different numbers of songs showing as purchased online, on my phone, and on my PC.
• I finally decided the **** with it and did the update anyway. Might lose songs but who knows.
• The update wouldn't install and suddenly my iPhone won't connect, won't turn on, and just tells me I have to restore it.
• To restore it, Apple told me to install Apple Mobile Device app. The update finally installed.
• Now my phone functioned again, but when I connected it to my PC the Mobile Device app couldn't see it.
• I went to iTunes to see if I could connect and it said all my music would now be handled by Apple Music so I had to install that app.
• I got the Apple Music app installed but it wouldn't recognize my iPhone either. At this point, iTunes didn't have my music anymore - it only had podcasts.
• I researched and found that iTunes and Apple Music and Apple Mobile Devices are basically incompatible for music so I uninstalled Apple Music and Apple Mobile apps from my PC.
• Still having problems - my PC can see my iPhone just fine but iTunes refuses to ever since I updated the iOS.
• Found another article that said I would need to install a legacy version of iTunes for it to work: iTunes 64-bit. By this point I'm getting punchy so I uninstalled the current iTunes and installed the legacy version.
• Then it wouldn't start because the library file (.itl) was too new . I rename the .itl file and finally legacy iTunes starts.
• And even more exciting, it even recognizes my iPhone! So I go to start the sync.
• BUT IT WON'T SYNC!!! It speeds through all the steps of a sync with nothing syncing. No error messages, nothing. Especially no music on my iPhone.

This is why I use Spotify. It doesn't help with the several hundred CDs I spent hours and hours ripping, but at least I can listen to music when I'm away from my PC.

Honestly, I'd be delighted to get this fixed, but at this point I am so beyond aggravated I'm not sure I could make myself try again. And I am also sorely tempted to switch to Android.