Yeah I figured out the option click to show the normal way instead of the dumbed down way after I wrote that, the actual resolution selection menu was default on Mojave for me, I never saw that "larger text/more space" BS until I installed Catalina.
I have a LG 49WL95C-W connected to to a '17 iMac Pro via USB C. The steps I took - Updated to Catalina > installed LG onscreen control>allow "onscreen control" and "OSCMultimonitor" accessibility in the privacy tab of "security & privacy preferences> updated monitor firmware via LG onscreen control app > download disable monitor> move to applications folder>run disable monitor> little monitor icon should appear in top menu with all native and connected displays listed> set correct resolution to respective monitor.
After using this for a couple of day, I have to say that it works much better than it did before when selected in OSX. I was having an issue with the LG monitor randomly disconnecting and reconnecting frequently. It has not happened once since I've been using disable monitor.