Thanks for the suggestion.
Note that this problem only became visible post Mojave 10.14.5. I can rol back to High Sierra and there is no problems. I would actially love to roll back to 10.14.5 but thats simple not possible as we know. I do have a 2018 MAC Pro that is running 10.14.5 and it has no issues. Most of the external monitor issues commenced with the supplementary updates to 10.14.6 which resulted in things like the WindowServer process going high CPU when night shift was enabled as the kernel tried to switch resolutions every 1ms. (See my previous Apple tickets). The resolution to this issue via apple engineers was to disable nigh shoft and wait for Catalina. While Catalina has fixed the night shift issue it seems to have introduced 2 new issues and not addressed the polling issue from 10.14.6. I have posted these to the community.
I'll try Safe mode when I do not need to use the MAC for work functions as its not a mode I can run in during business hours for obvious reasons.
With regards to plugging the monitor directly into the MAC and seeing if the problem persists this is simply not possible unless i get an external HDMI type tester to see if there is a signal. As stated, the MAC is asleep, there is no display, the MAC polls the external monitor but neither the monitor or MAC every displays anything as the MAC is asleep. The polling causes the splitter to switch computers however. Upon the switch i end up with a blank screen because the MAC is asleep and not doing anything. Hope that explains why this suggestion is simply impossible to execute upon.
If Apple can get the OS back to a state where external monitor connection is stable and functional I don;t think I will be upgrading the OS ever again until the MAC is retired from a business use. The unreliability of minor updates and the carry over across releases that force major changes I just can not sustain in a business environment.
Thanks for the response. It will be another 16hrs before i can try safe mode.