Hi rosita161,
Thank you for using the Apple Support Communities! I understand you are unable to set up Face ID on your iPhone XR, and I'd like to help.
You mentioned your iPhone is up to date. Just to confirm, please navigate to Settings > General > Software Update, and make sure there have not been any new releases since you last checked. If there is a new iOS version, please update: Update your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch - Apple Support, and test for the same behavior. If the issue remains, or you are up to date already, continue below.
Try out these steps next. Be sure to test for resolution after each step, before moving to the next.
-Make sure your Ring/Silent switch is set to Ring mode: How to put your iPhone on vibrate, ring, or silent mode - Apple Support.
-Restart your iPhone: Restart your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch - Apple Support.
If you continue to experience the same issue, please reply back and let me know if you see any alerts such as 'Face ID has been disabled', or, 'Face ID is not available'.
Best regards.