Ipad Disabled, cannot connect to itunes

My new iPhone set up by my grandchildren has been disabled as I forgot password. I have seen the directions to restore the ios. As I didn't know the password I have set up a new iTunes account for myself. But the ipad does not connect with iTunes and I have tried to get into recovery mode and dfu mode and cannot. When I hold the power button and a volume button I can shut off the ipad but when I continue to hold and connect to computer it gives me apple logo and hen back to ipad disabled screen.

I live in the Pacific where there is no authorised repair person and there is someone who says can fix it but wants a lot of money and again just asked for the email address and password that it was originally set up to. Which I don't know.

Can anyone offer any other suggestions as to how to fix this. I have used an apple lead and a generic lead an neither connect. A friend tried to connect her iPhone 5 to iTunes and it comes up with an unknown error that we cannot get around either, however the iPhone 4 connects to the iTunes. So im stumped as to what is the problem.

The Model is A2197 Serial DM***F3V 7th Gen. I selected 6th Gen below as there was no option for 7th Gen

[Personal Information Edited by Moderator]