Audiobooks: auto download, auto play = data wasting

How do I prevent audiobooks from downloading and automatically playing when connecting to a car system?

Since iOS 13 I have found that when connecting to my car, an audiobook automatically starts playing. I personally like to be in control and choose when and what to listen to, and I even currently have removed all music on my iPhone iTunes app for this reason.

Some years ago I bought some audiobooks, checked them out, then forgot about them... but for some reason Apple have now decided to move them to the Books app. As a result, even though I have no interest in listening to them anymore, one will download in the background without permission, with all data permissions for Books switched off, and then start playing without warning.

If I go into the Books app I can choose to remove from Reading now, remove download, and hide audiobook. This prevents the book from playing, until it takes another opportunity to download itself and start up again when I next get in the car. I can’t describe how much I hate this behaviour.

This month, my quota for data ran out within 10 days, and I have never gone over it before. I had to purchase more. Today alone, a book has downloaded itself three times. I don’t even want the books on my phone at all and I find this entire experience execrable.

For some people I can understand that this would be great to have automatic narration, but as far as I can make out, and I’ve been struggling with this for several months, I have no choice and I am fed up with it. It seems to me an inane system constructed by people who have no idea what they are doing.

If there is some setting that I am yet to find I would be so grateful to anyone who can help.