Wife’s account disabled and I cannot add her to family sharing.

Does your wife see a message that says "Your account has been disabled in the App Store and iTunes", there may be a problem with the payment method that you have on file.

When you see the message, don't try to edit any of your account information. Instead, contact Apple Support for help.

Source: If you see a message that says “Your account has been disabled in the App Store and iTunes” – Apple Support

If not in the App Store/iTunes

If your Apple ID is locked or disabled - Apple Support.    

If you have changed your ID or password, have you followed the steps in this article?

What to do after you change your Apple ID or password - Apple Support.      

If necessary, contact Apple ID Support for assistance.  See the Apple Support articles below for contact information.  

Apple ID - Official Apple Support.    

Contact Apple for help with Apple ID account security - Apple Support.   (Link doesn’t always load)  

Get Support          Work through the screens to get a chat option. You may have to pick a slightly different problem.

Starting an online chat with Apple Support

Apple Support schedule phone call

https://twitter.com/AppleSupport.          People have posted it may take an hour or more to get a response.

From the Apple Support article below. 

Without proof of your identity via security questions and other carefully selected criteria, Apple Support can't help you reset a password or perform any other actions on your account. These policies are audited and reviewed on a regular basis.

Security and your Apple ID - Apple Support.      

If you forgot the passcode for your iPhone, or your iPhone is disabled https://support.apple.com/en-us/HT204306

The instructions are essentially the same for an iPad and iPod touches. “If you enter the wrong passcode too many times, you’ll see a message that your device is disabled. If you can’t remember your passcode, you'll need to erase your iPhone, which deletes your data and settings, including the passcode.”

If you backed up your iPhone, you can restore your data and settings after restoring your iPhone. If you never backed up your iPhone before you forgot your passcode, you won't be able to save the data on your iPhone. Follow the steps below to remove your passcode.”

Next, remove your passcode (see the document for the steps). Then, restore your phone on your computer (see the document for the steps).

“If you can't update or restore your iPhone using recovery mode, or you can't use recovery mode because of broken or stuck buttons, contact Apple Support. Then follow the steps to set up service for your iPhone.”