This is the first time I have had this problem with an IOS update. I am on an iPhone XR 64gb, with 15gb free space. I am surprised to read someone else suggesting that one needs 20-30gb free space just for an incremental update....that's huge ! If that's true, there must be loads of users who won't be able to complete the update. However, here's what happened to me:
I tried 3 times to download and install this update. Got the error message each time and before each new attempt, I went into Settings - General - Storage and deleted the update files. Then I disabled my VPN connection after the 3rd failed attempt to download. After this step....it worked. I wonder why ? I haven't ever had a problem using VPN whilst updating software before.
In general, I have to say that I have spent more time troubleshooting issues on my principal Mac devices (phone and computers) over the last 6 months than I did over the previous 3 years. What is happening at Apple ? Too much money maybe ?!? (= complacency).