Hello raina,
Does Apple know that the iOS 14.x updates are causing all sorts of issues with CarPlay? It's all over the place, here, in Reddit and elsewhere. The problems vary depending on the vehicle apparently. Usually iPhones with iOS 13.x work perfectly. In many cases CarPlay stops working right after the update.
In my case, the car is a brand new Acura TLX 2021. CarPlay worked perfectly with two different iPhones XS Max, but stopped working yesterday right after updating to 14.2. I did all the hocus pocus one can do with the phone, without any avail. Now comes the sweet part: I read somewhere that for someone, CarPlay was not working when the phone was initially charged to 100 percent. I know, I know, that's a weird one. But anyway I tried again this morning with the phone 80 percent charged and… it worked instantly right after I plugged it.
This is one weird one. I will have to recheck this over the next few days and try to reproduce this, and see if it was not sheer luck…
Too many issues with too many people, right after an update. That puts the finger squarely on Apple, my beloved company. Here they goofed somewhere and they should acknowledge it, not put the blame on the car manufacturers. Don't get me wrong, this is one wonderful phone. But for me CarPlay has become an essential tool and it should work as easily as any Apple product, seamlessly and without having to try a lot of workarounds.