i cant get my activation code from the owner how can i pass it?

If the owner will not or cannot unlock it for you, then you own a brick. Without them actively releasing it for your use, you will never be able to use it.

Show them this document -> How to remove Activation Lock - Apple Support

The can disable activation lock for you without giving out their AppleID password.

Can you share with us a picture of the screen you cannot get passed?