I have an old ipad that screen says "iPad is disabled, connect to itunes". But i cannot connect to itunes, I cannot get it to do anything.

If your iPad is disabled, or you have forgotten your iPad passcode, you have no alternative other than to follow this process:

If you’ve forgotten the passcode on your iPad, or your iPad is disabled – Apple Support

You’ll need access to either a PC (with iTunes installed) or a Mac (with iTunes or Finder - as appropriate for the installed version of MacOS).

Download and use iTunes for Windows – Apple Support

Update to the latest version of iTunes – Apple Support

If your iPad is not recognised by your computer when connected, this support page may be helpful with troubleshooting:

If your computer doesn't recognize your iPhone, iPad, or iPod - Apple Support

Use of a PC or Mac is unavoidable. If you don’t have access to a suitable computer of your own, that of a helpful friend or family member will suffice. Alternatively, the technicians at the Genius Bar of your local Apple Store or Apple Authorised Service Provider (AASP) will be delighted to assist.

You may also need your AppleID and associated password. If these have also been forgotten, they can be recovered here:

https://iforgot.apple.com

To recover your credentials, you’ll need access to one of the following:

• Your primary email address mailbox that corresponds with your AppleID
• Any of the secondary/recovery email addresses that should be configured for your AppleID account
• Any of the trusted telephone numbers (fixed line or Cellular/Mobile) that are associated with your AppleID

Unless you AppleID account has not been fully/correctly configured, or has been seriously neglected, recovery of the AppleID and password should not be difficult.

More information about recovery of your AppleID:

If you forgot your Apple ID - Apple Support

More information about recovery of your AppleID password:

If you forgot your Apple ID password - Apple Support

When you recover access to your credentials, you would be well advised to log-in to your AppleID account from a web browser - and verify/update any email addresses and trusted telephone numbers:

https://appleid.apple.com

if this is a very old iPad and it went into restore mode, any data that was on this iPad is already gone and lost forever.

If this iPad is very old,,it is NOT worth spending the time and efforts to resurrect/reset this old device.

Its built ib iOS Web browser will be too old and no longer safe and secure to be trusted on the modern Internet.

Sorry.

Apple ended support for all 8-10-year old iOS devices nearly 5 years, ago, in 2016.

Third party app developers abandoned and stopped supporting these 8-10-year old iOS devices nearly 3 years, ago, in 2018.

There are, virtually, NO MORE third party apps available from the iOS App Store, any longer!

Third party compatible apps for such old devices are few and far between, now, in 2021.

This includes apps for both iOS 9 AND iOS 10 devices!

Simply put, that old Pad maybe too old and obsolete now.

Sorry, but this is the reality for ALL 8-10-year old AND OLDER iOS devices now. Especially now in 2021!

If you need/want an iPad with an up to date iPadOS with access to current, updated apps, then you really need to seriously consider a purchase of a new iPad model OR a much, MUCH “newer” and less expensive, refurbished or used iPad models, from better known, trusted Apple product/device retailers/resellers, some locally or from online, on the Web/Internet, capable of running the latest iPadOS versions.

There are PLENTY of less expensive, newer, older iPad models that can run the latest, current versions of iPadOS.

I am sorry that you had to learn all of this, but this does not change any of the facts regarding these very old iOS devices.

Sorry & Best of Luck to You!

You have to follow these instructions

If you forgot the passcode on your iPad, or your iPad is disabled - Apple Support