i just bought a iphone XR and i can;t ge siri to speak her responses - I have followed the instructions to no avail - can someone help me

Hi were123,

Welcome to the Apple Community,

where some of us do our best to help each other troubleshoot.

Wondering just what suggestions you followed without success,

and

whether you might want to update to iOS 15 ?

What’s new in iOS 15

https://support.apple.com/en-au/guide/ipod-touch/iphfed2c4091/ios

Update your iPhone, iPad or iPod touch

https://support.apple.com/en-us/HT204204

Apple support has articles online that may help with Siri:

Change Siri settings on iPhone

https://support.apple.com/en-au/guide/iphone/iphc28624b81/15.0/ios/15.0

or

If "Hey Siri" isn't working on your iPhone or iPad

https://support.apple.com/en-au/HT207489

All the best :-)