How do i let someone use my apple id but not let them receive my messages and photos
How can share my apple id to someone else but not letting them receive my messages and my photos
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You cannot do so. Like with any online services account, if someone else can login with your login ID they have the exact same access to everything associated with that account as you do. The system doesn’t know who is logging in. It just sees the valid login ID connecting and viola, they have the same access as you.
This is why you should never share online service account login ID, including your AppleID.
Anyone who can login with your AppleID can read your iCloud email, see your FaceTime calls, messages, notes, iPhone call logs, etc. they have the same access as you do to those accounts.
That person can also change the password and lock you out. They could over-write your iCloud backups with their devices backups or corrupt your backups with their data. Their device data such as contacts could end up merging with yours. They can delete files, photos, messages. They can do anything you can do.