Family member passed away without us getting the pin for her phone.

Note that Apple can help gain access to someone’s online iCloud account information, they cannot reset the screen lock passcode so you can gain access to that device itself.

There is one, and only one way to reset a screen lock passcode and that requires erasing it. Apple has no other internal solution either. iOS and iPadOS are designed that way to ensure that no one can gain access to a locked device, with the data intact, unless they know the screen lock passcode.

Click ▷ How to request access to a deceased family member's Apple account. 