iphone xr in recovery mode will not update to latest ios update and will not restore

Hello prettyboyfloyd44,

Thank you for reaching out to Apple Support Communities, and we'll be happy to help in any way we can. We understand you're having issues with restoring your iPhone. Try the steps listed here to see if they resolve the issue: If you can't update or restore your iPhone or iPod touch - Apple Support

"You can put your iOS device in recovery mode, then restore it using your computer.

In these situations, you might need to use recovery mode to restore your device:

• Your computer doesn't recognize your device or says it's in recovery mode.
• If your screen is stuck on the Apple logo for several minutes with no progress bar.
• You see the recovery mode screen.

Learn what to do if you see the progress bar on your screen for several minutes.

Put your device in recovery mode and set it up again

1. Make sure that your Mac is up to date. If you're using iTunes, make sure you have the latest version of iTunes. 
2. On a Mac with macOS Catalina or later, open Finder. On a Mac with macOS Mojave or earlier, or on a PC, open iTunes. If iTunes is already open, close it, then open it again. Find out which macOS your Mac is using.
3. Keep your device connected and wait until the recovery mode screen appears:

• iPhone 8 or later, including iPhone SE (2nd generation): Press and quickly release the volume up button. Press and quickly release the volume down button. Then, press and hold the side button until you see the recovery mode screen.
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• iPhone 7, iPhone 7 Plus, and iPod touch (7th generation): Press and hold the top (or side) and volume down buttons at the same time. Keep holding them until you see the recovery mode screen.
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• iPhone 6s or earlier, including iPhone SE (1st generation), and iPod touch (6th generation) or earlier: Press and hold both the Home and the top (or side) buttons at the same time. Keep holding them until you see the recovery mode screen.
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1. Locate your device on your computer. When you see the option to Restore or Update, choose Update. Your computer will try to reinstall the software without erasing your data. Wait while your computer downloads the software for your device. If the download takes more than 15 minutes and your device exits the recovery mode screen, let the download finish, then repeat step 3.
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4. After the Update or Restore completes, set up your device.

Get more help

• If you see an error when you update or restore your iPhone or iPod, learn what to do.
• If you can’t update or restore your device with recovery mode, you can't use recovery mode because of broken buttons, or your device is stuck in Activation Lock, contact Apple Support."

We hope this helps.

Cheers!