How to reset screen time passcode without "Forgot Passcode option" showing?

Hey there, and welcome to Apple Support Communities erinpfaff,

We can certainly understand your concern and see you came to us from the article If you see an iPhone or iPad unavailable message or Security Lockout screen.

To answer your question, you must use the "Forgot Password" option in order to change your password. We recommend checking out these steps for more information on how to reset your Screen Time password.

" If you forgot your Screen Time passcode 

Learn how to reset your passcode if you forgot it. 

Use the steps below if you forgot your Screen Time passcode or the Screen Time passcode for a member of your Family Sharing group. If you forgot the passcode to unlock your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch, or you get a message that says it's disabled, follow these steps instead. 

How to reset the Screen Time passcode for your personal device

Use the steps below to change your Screen Time passcode on iPhone, iPad, iPod touch, or Mac. 

On an iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch

1. Go to Settings > Screen Time. 
2. Tap Change Screen Time Passcode, then tap Change Screen Time Passcode again.
3. Tap Forgot Passcode?

4. Enter the Apple ID and password* that you used to set up the Screen Time passcode.

5. Enter a new Screen Time passcode, then enter it again to confirm.

On a Mac

1. Make sure that your Mac is updated to macOS Catalina 10.15.4 or later. 
2. Choose Apple menu  > System Settings or System Preferences, then click Screen Time.
3. Click Change Passcode, then click Forgot Passcode. 
4. Enter the Apple ID and password* that you used to set up the Screen Time passcode.
5. Enter a new Screen Time passcode, then enter it again to confirm.

If you have Share Across Devices turned on, your new Screen Time passcode will automatically update on those devices after you reset it. 

If you still have issues resetting your Screen Time passcode, contact Apple Support. "

For additional information, check out this link: If you forgot your Screen Time passcode - Apple Support

These steps will help ensure your device is working with ease and can fix common issues like the ones you’re experiencing.

Kindest regards!