pairing apple tv with iphone remote without apple remote

i lost my remote and I would like to connect my apple tv to the wifi so i can use my iphone remote.

If you can’t borrow an Apple TV remote to help set up this part, then you are advised to buy a replacement remote.

If your model Apple TV box is A1625 or later, then you can connect an iPhone once both are on the same home network.

If your model Apple TV box is A1469 or A1427, then you additionally need a functional old style physical remote (A1294) to pair the software remote.

Identify your Apple TV model - Apple Support

Find your Apple TV model number - Apple Support

iPhone software remote for various models Apple TV - Apple Community

Buy Siri Remote (3rd generation) - Apple TV accessories - Apple Store online

If you lost your Apple TV remote - Apple Support

Reconnect the Siri Remote to Apple TV - Apple Support

Apple TV HD, tvOS 10

If this system software version (v10) is accurate, then this box hasn’t seen an update in a very long time (2016–2017). You will need a functional remote to do updates. Be aware that the current model replacement remote has a minimum software requirement of tvOS 15.4, which might be a ‘Catch 22’.

Apple TV remote models and their compatibility - Apple Support

Update your Apple TV - Apple Support (currently up to tvOS 17.3 for Apple TV HD or later)

About Apple TV 4K and Apple TV HD software updates - Apple Support