Media and Purchases - Unable to Download Apps

I am unable to download apps due to some account issue. I suspect a disconnect between my account and device, but am unsure of how to resolve it. Some pertinent details. I've signed into account.apple.com and completed all possible pieces of information. Twice, where possible. Literally. I'm still getting this error. Also, in the event it adds to the picture, I've added a screenshot of Media and Purchases. It is blank. I'm not sure if that's normal.

How do I get past the erroneous Account Police and to enable the download of apps?