Connecting iPhone with MacBook over WiFi-Family Sharing

MacBook Pro running Sequoia 15.2

iPhone 12 running 18.2

We share a Family account with individual Apple IDs. I need to be able to connect with his phone over wifi in order to use the parenting software (Bark). Even with the parental controls Apple offers, I need additional coverage and Apple doesn't play nice with other programs. When I connect his phone over USB, there are no problems but I used to be able to over wifi and no longer can. Troubleshooting with Apple always starts with making sure both devices are signed into the same Apple ID and that obviously isn't going to work if I need to monitor his online activities. I don't even know if this is the problem but everything else seems to be in alignment: iOS updated on both, both on the same wifi network, no VPN or other profiles set up, all devices with my ID can connect over wifi. This all used to work seamlessly and all of a sudden, it's all gone wonky.

Any way around the required same ID on both devices or additional suggestions?