How to share or sync Contacts list between two iCloud accounts for a family?

" 1) share Contacts list or 2) sync Contacts list: between me and my wife each with their own icloud account"

So, my wife and I tried to solve this need. Initially we used the same icloud account... We definitely shared the contacts list containing all our friends, family members, businesses we deal with, restaurants, stores, doctors, etc. But that idea played **** with the operation of our phones, etc. At one release of IOS we started getting each other's texts, etc. Even call history. Family Sharing doesnt allow sharing of Contacts list. Why not? It seems a perfect candidate for what families want to do. The folks at the local Apple store spent more time exploring our motives that didn't seem to make sense to them. Multiplde trips over a few years often got "Why would you ever want to do that?" as one of the first questions. When we explained, they understood - but no answer ever came other than promises to tell Apple for this need. As it turns out, we know quite a few people who would like this capability. And the icing on the cake would be support for multiple Contact lists (some to share, some to keep private).

[Re-Titled by Moderator]