iPhone 17 Pro -- Cellular drops or doesn't connect

I have a new iPhone 17 Pro and I cannot make or receive calls on it. The cellular drops when the phone is unlocked, which means any call I receive is immediately dropped. I tried making a call on it today to get a couple prescriptions filled, so, you know, nothing important. I was able to connect a couple times, but the microphone wasn't working. Even text messages are spotty and I don't always receive them. None of the "trouble shooting" steps work and there is no information on this from Apple. Obviously I can't call Apple for support, because the phone doesn't work. To say I'm a bit miffed by this, after paying over a thousand dollars for this, would be incredibly understated.

Anyway, has anyone else had these or similar issues? And if so, were you able to fix them?

Here's what I've done so far:

Installed iOS 26 on my old iPhone 14 Pro

Copied over the contents of the 14 Pro to the new 17 Pro

Updated to iOS 26.01

Reset the old 14 Pro, unfortunately.

Discovered the phone call issue

Reinstalled NordVPN in case that was an issue; I don't believe it is

Powered down the phone

Reset the network

Currently I'm trying the support app but it's not working at all -- Just freezes. No surprise there.

If anything it's gotten worse. How Apple can screw up this bad is just beyond me; usually they just break WiFi and BlueTooth.

Anyway, any helpful suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

[Edited by Moderator]