Hi all
My story so far...
I have always had a flaky Home Sharing experience with an iTunes library on an iMac, an ATV 3 and remote running on an iPhone 4 and an iPad "3". The ATV frequently lost the connection to my iMac. Oddly, AirPlay from the iMac to the ATV had always been pretty good and I don't remember any problem with Remote or indeed the Music app on iPhone or iPad.
I recently bought a new Billion 7300N router to replace the dreadful (hah!) BT Homehub 2 and things seemed to be worse, with Remote in particular becoming totally useless on the iPad (I think it's not the same code base on the iPhone or iPad as there's a bug affecting one but not the other) and Music not working on either the iPad or iPhone.
Despite what others have suggested I feel this is an Apple software problem and nothing to do with the router, mainly as evidenced by the fact it has always been bad even on the old router and no one has been able to definitely say what they have done with a Billion router to correct the problem. It's even more confused now as I've seen several Apple software updates happening around the same time as my hardware change, to iTunes and ATV, and I don't use the Home Sharing/AirPlay features often enough to really notice a particular update causing the problem...
Anyway, I've turned off IPv6 ('networksetup -setv6off Wi-Fi' in Terminal), turned off the Mac firewall and removed iTunes plist files. Weirdly things seemed momentarily better with both ATV and iTunes coming up in the iPhone Remote, but not in iPad Remote. Minutes later I'm back to having remote control of ATV from the iPhone but not from iPad, my iTunes library cannot be found by Remote or Music on either iPhone or iPad and ATV is not connecting to my iTunes library. Also I can no longer AirPlay from the iMac to ATV, although I can from my iPhone!
I haven't done any of the port forwarding because I can't find instructions on how to do this on my router and it's all too complicated for me. Sounds rubbish I know, I'm actually technically very competent, but this is too much! If anyone is happy to babysit me through trying it out, I'll give it a go but from other's comments I'm not confident it will work.
In summary: I think Home Sharing has been the lowest of the low points in terms of Apple features ever rolled out. My line of work means I'm very aware of Apple's recent developments and I'm often heard saying RIP Steve Jobs. This system simply cannot be that hard to get working properly...
Really appreciate the community effort here though 🙂 Fingers crossed it will work out soon.
pd