I think Apple doesn't recommend it for performance reasons; not stability reasons.
Both machines post the correct memory speed, and even more interestingly, on the memory tab of the system profiler it even reminds me to be sure to fill the next DIMM slot with the same speed. I have read reports previously about how it was possible to use slower or faster RAM than recommened in Macbooks as long as they matched: http://serato.com/forum/discussion/787489
My understanding is that the system detects the slower memory, and then runs a but slower as a result. Similarly to how your system might behave if you swapped in a faster or slower processor in Macs that support that (i.e. the New Mac Pros have modular CPUs).
I'm not stating this would work in all Macs, and I don't think this would work will all memory speeds. I just know this works for these two machines.
Oh and FWIW, I did a memory stress test as well. It ran for 8 hours, and passed all checksums. What I haven't done, is run a benchmark test on a single Mac, with the two memory variations to see the performance hit. I'm sure it's there, I just don't care much because the machine with the slower memory is a server.
Also be interested to see if the older machine with the faster memory got a speed boost memory wise. What would be more interesting as it was sold with 1333 MHz memory. I somehow doubt it would.