I have the exact same problem.
Gee, do I hate this!
I used to be an "early adopter", but it was simply taking more and more time resolving strange (/somebody else's QA) issues, and so I gave up on this behaviour.
Nowadays, I wait for a while and only then install new software.
However, because of all kind of security issues, you have to install your OS updates quickly and there you have it!
Please Apple develop a Palm-like device quickly (and include a phone!) so that I am sure the combination of "stuff" I have is covered by your QA tests!
I'm willing to pay for it!
Though the Palm is still a great device, the software integration with the Mac is a problem that's getting worse year after year.