As these are user-to-user forums, you're not talking to iTunes Support nor Apple, I've asked the hosts to remove the email addresses from your post (it's not a good idea to post personal info on any public forum).
She's tried the iforgot page on all of those accounts, and any other email accounts that she/you have, and none of them get any password reset emails (and she's checked the spam folders on those email accounts as well as their inboxes) ?
Had she bought/downloaded any apps on her computer's iTunes with the account that the iPad was activated with, and are they still on her computer ? If she has then she can get the id from those apps : http://support.apple.com/kb/HT1920
Unless she can remember the id that she used in Settings > iCloud to activate Find My iPad on it then she won't be able to remove the iPad from the account