how do you remove an icon that wont delete

From what? And what does this have to do with Apple Remote Desktop?

Could it possibly be an icon for a program that came with the IOS, like Photos, Music, Apple Watch. If so, put it with other unused icons and move to last page where it won't be a bother. If it is not a built in app, try deleting from the App page while connected to the computer.

Do a hard reset on your phone. It will be gone when you subsequently unlock your phone.

Doing a reset will not affect your apps. Since the OP has not responded, we don't know if it is an apple app, an added app, or if they have any restrictions enabled.