Hi, treyway17.
We know your time is valuable, and we appreciate you taking the time to post in the Apple Support Communities.
It sounds like you and your wife were experiencing a few issues with connectivity and unresponsiveness after updating your iPhone devices. Is this still occurring? If it is, we’d like to see if we can offer some assistance. Our wish for you is that you’re able to enjoy all of the new features and fixes in an iOS update without any of the nuances of troubleshooting.
If most of your concerns seem to relate to your calls not going through to each other, and you’ve already updated to the latest iOS version and tried restarting both devices, we urge you to check for a carrier settings update. This article will show you how:
Update your carrier settings on your iPhone or iPad - Apple Support
If you’re noticing that calls to others are also struggling, try the rest of the steps outlined here::
If you can't make or receive calls on your iPhone - Apple Support
You might also check to see how you’re doing on available storage after the update. Navigate to Settings > General > iPhone Storage to check. Your device will need some available space to make sure all of the programs and processes have flexibility to function. If you’re low on space it could explain some of the performance issues you’re experiencing.
We also suggest checking your battery health at Settings > Battery > Battery Health, a battery in need of replacement can also impact performance. This article explains in excellent detail:
iPhone Battery and Performance - Apple Support
If these steps don’t help with a resolution, reply here with more details.
- Which iPhone devices are you using? What is the current iOS version on both?
- What did you find for available storage and your battery health for each?
- What exactly happens when your calls to each other fail?
- Did any of the troubleshooting steps seem to help, if only temporarily?
Warmest Regards.