How can you find out someone cloned your phone

Hi Bob. I have a few questions. I’ll name them

1. How did the name ReitaJo come up for me. I’ve never used it. That’s my mom who died last April.
2. I have a hacker that gets all my info and I’m close to tracing it down. He registered as a user in my mobile banking and slowly I’m seeing bigger charges from him.
3. he goes in and messes with my pictures and I’ll find them in trash and a special album my phone wouldn’t know that.
4. Therd is spyware in the phone. I detected it cuz pictures people kept telling me they were screenshots. A screen shot can’t take a picture of your whole room. I had one with my bills spread on my bed and the picture showed itemized bills u close and a ways back. The spyware I can only see if I take another phone and put it on video so the flash doesn’t warn it to shut down. It’s a purple bulb and flashes nonstop since last June or July. It takes pictures of everything. I promise I’m not loony. I’m vey irritated because some cons got me this June and got 45,000.00 from me and we are still talking. My iTunes gets used all the time. I got a PayPal and they charge in it so I try and take the card out but I lose all subscriptions icloud etc. I’ve found PayPal statements in notes. Fight him and I have in texts. And they are edited to just me yelling at him. Just very confused and everytime I get money saved for a new phone he charges again. I don’t know how to get a phone won’t transferring him over too. He has himself linked to all my contacts and I try but can’t delete
5. thank you for your time. I don’t know what to do. My family won’t forgive me for giving that money away and it was my money. All my inheritance from my mom. So I have no support at all just counselor.

Apple support tech said yes it’s very likely that’s what is going on. I offered the videos of the spyware.