iPhone 13 Pro Max Camera....Camera Focuses on Wrong Thing/Blurry/Unintended Bokeh?....

Hello,

I recently upgraded to the iPhone 13 Pro Max (and have had just about every version of iPhone from the first through this one, sans 8 and X, so I'm very familiar with how the camera, and the pictures it produces, SHOULD be).

And just to clarify, I'm talking about the photos produced in regular "Photo" mode...not Portrait, or any other mode).

Having said that, I've noticed that regardless of whether I'm taking a rear-camera Selfie with my extended arm/hand, or using a Selfie-Stick, that the camera (many times) seems to either not be able to decide what to focus on (and thus most things in the picture are "Soft" (ie: not blurry, but definitely not Sharp))., or it seems to default to an Aperture in the low single digits (ie: 4.5-ish), and thus I (the camera holder/selfie-taker), am REALLY sharp, whereas my GF, who might be only 1-2 feet behind me (to get the full outfit, of course), is soft/out of focus/blurry.

Why does this iPhone 13 Pro Max camera seem to default to a low Aperture/shallow depth of field number instead of a higher (read: double-digit) Aperture number where Everything would be in focus?

And, yes, I'm familiar with the AF Lock, and even doing that, the camera still seems to get confused about what it should focus on.

Suggestions?...