Can't change the double-tap action or the press-and-hold action on AirPod 3rd generation

Not the question. There are no options to control the air pods under the Bluetooth app, choosing the AirPods 3. Other options are there, but not to control each airpod like the other AirPod models

There is no tap action on the Airpods 3.

They have a force sensor you squeeze.

AirPods (3rd generation) controls

Each of your AirPods (3rd generation) has a Force Sensor on the stem. You can use the Force Sensor to do any of the following:

• Play and pause audio: Press the Force Sensor once. To resume playback, press it again.
• Play the next track: Press the Force Sensor twice.
• Play the previous track: Press the Force Sensor three times.
• Answer a call: When you receive a call, press the Force Sensor.
• Activate Siri: Press and hold the Force Sensor, then ask questions, control apps, and more.

AirPods controls - Apple Support