Hello Bigw5758,
To change your AOL account password, you'll need to work with AOL Support. Here's a guide from AOL Support with those steps: Reset or change your password
If instead this is regarding your Apple ID account, you'll want to follow these steps to reset your password: If you forgot your Apple ID password
You mention being unable to use the iPad for several years due to the password issue you're having. Are you seeing an Activation Lock sign in when trying to use your iPad? If so, you'll definitely need to regain access to your Apple ID account. If for some reason you are not able, you still may be able to have Activation Lock removed if you can provide the requested information. More details about how to remove Activation Lock can be found here: How to remove Activation Lock
We hope this helps. Thanks for participating in Apple Support Communities.
Take care.