Iphone takes over my stereo when usb charging cable plugged in on my 2018 Jeep JKU. How do I stop that?

I'm not too apple-tech knowledgeable.

rant on/ I swore to never buy another Apple product again since owning an iPhone 4s and iPad Air about a decade ago. I thought I would try an iPhone 11 (vers 15.3.1) because my kids phone took very nice pictures, and Apple now lets you use whatever charging cable you want to now...

Once again, I find Apple forcing me to use my device how apple wants me to, not how I want to use it. I'm starting to regret returning to apple.. /rant off

So, why does my iPhone insist on being treated like an iPod when I'm charging it in my 2018 Jeep Wrangler JK? Once I plug it into a charging cable in my Jeep, it starts connecting, kills my audio book or music, and gives me a "reading" message on my stereo.

I don't want my iPhone to do anything other than charge when I plug the lightning cable in. I want it to Bluetooth music, audible, etc. like my android devices did even while charging. Now, I have to wait minutes for anything to play from my phone while it "reads" stuff... if it even plays anything at all.

I've gone into settings and am assuming what is happening is "car play" starts when I plug my phone in. I thought I found a way to turn it off, yet when I unplug the USB and power off my jeep once I turn my Jeep back on and connect the charging cable the whole frustrating thing begins again.

Help!