my iPhone says an update is required to activate your iPhone and when I plugged in to my laptop it does not open

Re: "my iPhone says an update is required to activate your iPhone and when I plugged in to my laptop it does not open"

What to do: If your computer doesn't recognise your iPhone or iPad – Apple Support

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To update:

if you're using a Mac with macOS Catalina or later,

1. Open a Finder window on a Mac with macOS Catalina or later.
2. Connect your device to your computer.
3. Select your device in the left sidebar of the Finder window. Find out what to do if you don't see your device.
4. Click General, then click Check for Update. 
5. Click Download and Update. Continue by following the onscreen instructions.
6. If asked, enter your passcode. Find out what to do if you don't know your passcode.

or follow instructions in the article:

if you're using a Mac with macOS Mojave or earlier or a Windows PC.

All the best :-)