Hi HGH237,
welcome to the Apple (user-to-user) Community!
Thank you for posting your query about "Kia not reading USB on iPhone 13.Spouse's phone connects beautifully"
Re: "Any thoughts?"
Wondering whether both iPhones have the same up-to-date iOS 17 version installed:
About iOS 17 Updates - Apple Support says iOS 17.0.3 is the latest version.
If you want to check the troublesome phone is set-up correctly:
See: Set up CarPlay with your iPhone - Apple Support
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Re: "I suspect that it is a USB connector default".
Apple Support's online article: If you need help with CarPlay - Apple Support
says:
"If you have a wired connection:
try connecting again with a different USB cable to a different USB port if you have one".
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More info. / support / contact options etc.:
iPhone Support Website: iPhone - Official Apple Support
All the best :-)