This is long, but it includes an *easy* solution that works for me 100% of the time...
Exactly, John. A netsh reset to fix this problem is like reinstalling Windows (albeit on a smaller basis) to fix a problem w/ one program. It will fix the program -- but can cause other hard-to-figure-out problems. I had pointed that out on a different thread: "You'll also see solutions that use "netsh winsock reset". That seems to work for some people, too. But: the downside is that a reset may reset other things and require that other programs be reinstalled, possibly reintroducing this problem. Make sure you do a "netsh winsock show catalog >c:\winsockcat.txt" first so you'll have a record. I didn't try the reset b/c I'm worried about creating other problems."
Here is my current solution for my iTunes problems, restating what I wrote above and elsewhere and adding a few tweaks. I hope it helps someone else -- it makes iTunes usable for me.
For the search engines, let me state a list of symptoms...
Symptoms -- any of the following: iTunes hangs after launch; iTunes won't recognize your iPhone, iPad or iPod after you plug it in; Apple Mobile Device service uses up a lot of CPU; your iPhone/iPod/iPad/Apple TV won't connect to iTunes via Wifi (e.g. Sync with Wifi or making your iTunes library available to Apple TV).
Workaround for when any of the above happens. A little annoying, but only 20 seconds worth of work whenever you want to use iTunes to sync w/ your iPhone/iPod/iPad/Apple TV. Works 100% of the time for me:
--Exit iTunes. Is your iTunes hung? If so, use Microsoft's Process Explorer (free, search for it) or Windows' Task Manager (search for a tutorial) to kill itunes.exe. For PE, Run as Administrator to be sure you can kill what you need to.
--Unplug your device.
--Log onto an admin account if you're not.
--Go to the Start menu and type in services.msc (in Vista and Windows 7, type it in the search box; in XP, use the Run command). [If you like, set up a desktop or QuickLaunch shortcut to services.msc for convenient access. Be sure to set the properties to Run as Administrator.]
--Scroll down to "iPod Service" and left click it once. If there is a restart link on the left top, click it. If not, right click iPod Service and select Stop. Repeat, clicking Start.
--Scroll up to "Apple Mobile Device" and do the same thing.
--Open iTunes. Wait a few seconds until it looks like it's done initializing. Plug in your device or boot up your Apple TV. That should do 'ya! It will work fine until it gets hosed again -- simply repeat the process.
BTW, I now always right click on my device name in iTunes and select "Eject" before I unplug it. I'm not sure that actually helps, but I'm trying it to see if it prevents hangs.
If I wasn't clear above, let me know and I'll restate. Again, 20 seconds for me to do the above -- it's an easy process once you have done it twice.
I suspect that the problems fixed by the above are conflicts between antimalware programs and Apple's software system that includes iTunes and the two helper services I listed. I use Webroot and Comodo. But, who knows -- I just know my solution works for me. Good luck!