Look, there's no reason to snap at each other on here.
The problem is well documented, and every case helps prove it and push Apple and other manufacturers.
At the same time, there are plenty of cases where there are no problems at all - I mentioned one, with the Kenwood KDC-X696 head unit I purchased. It works perfectly with the iPhone 4, 4S, 5, and iPad 3 with iOS 5 and 6.
I know that a friend's Volkswagon EOS works at least as well with the iPhone 5 as it did with the iPhone 4, but for bluetooth it's limited to phone calls and always has been because of corners cut by Volkswagon.
Some people have found solutions that work, others haven't. Some people insist that their stereo won't work no matter what, while others with the same stereo claim there is no problem (Ford has come to my attention).
It's not simply that Apple "broke" something with iOS 6 - otherwise, the bluetooth connection would never work for anyone unless it was a device released after iOS 6, which is clearly not the case. It shouldn't have happened, but the fact that this bug was uncovered by an Apple update doesn't mean it is strictly Apple's fault.
Nevertheless, it sounds like iOS 6.1 may solve the issue for many.
I would be shocked if any tech support person at Apple, Pioneer, Kenwood, Ford, Inifiniti, Mercedes, or whoever (especially at a local repair shop) actually knew what was happening behind the scenes or admitted it. None of those companies will likely ever admit to being at fault. Many of those 3rd party manufacturers have stated they have updates on the way to fix the problem, and it sound like Apple does as well. Even after the fixes, they'll likely all point fingers at each other. Why admit fault if they don't have to?
That said, someone pointed to a document on here from Apple stating that there is a known incompatibility issue with iOS 6 and bluetooth, but I can't find it right now. So Apple isn't denying it, they just aren't broadcasting it while they work on a solution.
I think a major problem here is that until very recently, car manufacturers and stereo headset manufacturers never had to pay attention to compatibility or updates. This is a new world to them, and there are growing pains. It used to be that you simply replace your equipment every few years (from their standpoint). And they are notorious for not strictly adhering to technical standards.
Apple hosts these forums, but they never (to my knowledge) reply on them. So there will be no response on here, other than from other users trying to help each other.
Keep contacting Apple about it, by all means. But push the third party manufacturers as well, who are most likely at fault.