I spent 6 hours, I was ablo to get the icon back.
I was able to use Airplay to stream through my Airport Express on my iPad mini, icon was there working fine. Problem was a new Windows 7 laptop I got, the icon had never showed up on iTunes. Tried resetting Airport Express many times and defaulting to factory setting, no avail. I thought it must have something to do with fire walls, so I checked Windows 7 fire wall settings, got everything Apple related enabled, did not work.
I came across a post about Symantec and Airplay, it mentioned that Symantec could have something to do with the missing icon. I dug deeper, found Airplay was blocked by Symantec fire wall. Change the setting to allow Airplay, problem resolved.
Open up Symantec, "Network Threat Protection/Options/Configure Fire Wall Rules", find "Airplay" under "Rule Name", click "Edit", select "Allow this traffic", and "Apply this rule to the following network adapter: All network adapters".