Hello Demo & ShagCA,
You have both been very helpful...considering I am pretty much an novice.
Bottom line, you were both close and your advice was good.
What I eventually did (based on all your help) was to call Apple Care again and ask for a senior agent.
I told him that my AOL mail outgoing was port 465 and I wanted 587 and that when I looked at my AOL outgoing the server number was grayed out so I couldn't change it.
What the senior Apple Care advisor did was delete my AOL mail account and add it again...only I was instructed not to select AOL when presented with the menu of emails but rather chose "other" at the bottom and manually input my data. When setting up this AOL account it defaulted to outgoing port 465 (in black print)and I was able to change it to 587. We completed the process...and from then on everything went very well. AOL mail was able to sent in a speedy fashion.
Many thanks!